2.10.07

final conflict

Otree is home now from a trip that coursed through a gambit of different identities. From financial auditor, wanderer, beggar, Ultimate Tai Chi Track Stand instructor and finally International Americanese Superstar. Hoping for a quiet end to it all and a return to the simple high life back in the warehouse district of Minneapolis, Oshitree was dealt one final controversy before taking off from the International Chinese Airport. A tip came in from a source now known to be Daniel Armstrong, that a certain American with ties to the now overwhelming successful Ultimate Tai Chi methods, was said to have smuggled beef Haggis from the only Scottish restaurant in China aboard the Boeing 747 Air China airliner. A delay ensued and as Otree watched helplessly, many Chinese officials went through Otree's shit on the tarmac and discovered the delicious intestinal cuisine. When asked what he could possibly be thinking trying to sneak such a thing onto a plane headed to America, Otree just covered his mouth and mumbled "Amy needed a sample". The two guards watching over the search team seemed to appreciate this response and instead of arresting Otree, he was simply forced to sit in coach for the entire trip home. Now home and glad the whole ordeal is over, while sitting in Gods House of Coffee Beans and Worship across from his eurotree loft in the warehouse district, Steve, being interviewed by the ground breaking news source "Skyway News" was asked if he'd ever put himself in that position again, Steve replied "what?". After this final somewhat short interview, Steve was seen walking in the direction of Cuzzy's and hasn't been seen since.

1 comment:

Fride said...

I love that news source!